Our Dad

  Cam left for Alaska today. He's going on a fishing trip with my dad and brothers. They will have a wonderful time and I'm so excited for them. When the kids realized that Daddy was leaving today, they were devastated. Charlie kept saying that a week is too long and that he would miss Dad too much. Stella Grace was following her brother's lead and moping around too.
  Charlie went into the living room, took down a picture from him at a fathers and sons campout two years ago, went into his room and sat on his bed. When I went in to check on him, his eyes were full of tears and he snapped, "Mom, go out. I was doing a song." Daddy took some time to snuggle and talk for a few minutes to cheer up his boy. Stella tried to follow suit, but could only reach a picture of me. She had no idea why she was taking down a picture and announced her intent to hang it on the wall.
  It has been a unique couple of months with Cam away from home quite a bit. He's spent time in Wenatchee for Grandma King's funeral, in St. George with his parents wading through cancer treatment plans, and now a little time to disconnect. I'm grateful that we've had this time without him. I think I've learned a lot. I've always considered myself to be an independent person. I like being alone and doing things alone. I feel capable and confident in running our home and taking care of our wild children on my own. But tonight, I told my mom and Uncle Mark that I have learned how easy it is to minimize the importance of the father in the home. I think I am guilty of that. When you are the mother and the constant caretaker of your children, you start to think that you are the most important force in their lives-until their daddy starts packing for a trip.
  Cam's presence in our home is so important. He takes seriously his roles to provide, preside and protect. He takes opportunities to teach. He supports me in my decisions about home and family. He honors his priesthood and teaches our children about it. He shares a spiritual connection with the kids. Charlie loves to pray with his dad and looks for every opportunity to do it. Cam is a fun breath of fresh air. He is silly with the kids, pretends to be their doggy, wrestles and snuggles.
  Cam and Stella both speak the love language of touch. Cam is so much more receptive to Stella's need to be held and snuggled than I am. He had different expectations of what it would be like to be a father to his son (who prefers tools to toys and digging holes to playing cops and robbers-though he's pretty good at that too). Cam allows Charlie to teach him how to parent. He meets him in his passions and schedules trips to the hardware store.
  He is a calming influence when I get worked up and can help me be rational. He has a wider and deeper perspective about most things than I do. His insight helps me so much. Also, Cam really loves me. Sometimes I am surprised that someone could love me so much. It is a wonderful thing to be loved and appreciated. He is remarkable at telling me how great I am and recognizing the things I do for him (definitely my love language).
  Cam's testimony is a foundation for everything in our home and family. He knows how to pray and loves to do it. He studies and knows the gospel. Everything he does or wants to do has to do with service and his family. Everything. He has been observing and noting qualities of a father that he wants to emulate since he was a young boy. His choices about everything are strategic, including in our marriage and with our children. I love that. He never just hangs out with them. He finds a purpose. He chooses carefully how to spend his few precious minutes with his kids and with me. I love how deliberate he is about building a life for our family. The interactions, the words and the memories are carefully crafted. He never takes for granted the time that he has with us and devotes all of his mental and emotional energy into the good thing he's trying to do.
  Maybe more impressive than anything else is how he is so forgiving. He's never even been mad at me. He is quick to accept all blame and to love me up. Our relationships are peaceful, though not always smooth. He instigates nearly all conversations about problems that need resolving. We always finish the conversation loving each other more than ever and in complete agreement. That is his doing. I would give up and storm away, but he sees it through. Cam is so humble and admits failings quickly and frequently. He asks for forgiveness, which is a trait that is surprisingly rare. This extends, always, to our children. He explains it when he is wrong and asks for their forgiveness. He asks for their help in coming up with solutions and is so receptive to what they say. I just love him so much. I'm forever grateful he's my husband and Charlie and Stella's dad. We are so excited for him to come home!